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This is a blog about my life.... about living healthy through faith in God, exercise, good food, relationships, friendships, etc...

Thursday, November 26, 2009

Questioning

Things are beginning to get more serious with this guy. I have so many questions however of if we are a match. He is extremely attractive and a deep thinker like myself and he can make me laugh so hard- but I find myself wondering if he is emotionally supportive enough for me. He has said comments that lead me to think that he is hard on himself about a lot of things and being hard on himself could lead him to be hard on me.
For what we judge ourselves on is usually what we judge others on and hold them
to the same standards.

For example the other day we were talking about something and he said "I Hate.... something" and then right away he took it back and said "Hate is such a strong word, I dislike." He seems to perfect his words a lot because he may have been told to by someone else or he feels convicted to. It is so hard-lined though and I feel I need someone who is more accepting genuinely.

And then as far as physical appearance - I can't help think that maybe he is judging me for my looks the same way he judges himself.

I am attracted to him in so many ways, but leave feeling like he doesn't know the real me and "get" me and that I am someone I am not when I am around him. In my past relationship there was such a chemistry that I couldn't help but talk nonstop to him about everything. He was such a good listener. I want to become a better listener and I feel that I do less talking in this relationship - but I need to talk to sort things out in my head- I just don't feel comfortable because I don't fully know his deep underlying opinion of me yet. And that is only something that he can form in his own mind over time. I feel that we should almost step back and take the physical out of things - because it could confuse things for us if we are not in touch with our hearts and not just our physical connection.

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